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:~: Suicide :~:


4:27 pm
August 18, 2009


Master Shadowvillian

Posts: 3294

Abortion Clinic in the Witching Hour…


p.I.k.k. said:

A.L. said:

Post edited 12:30 am - April 29, 2009 by A.L.

Well Dot, I don't really know.

I think about suicide a lot ever since I got into the 7th grade (late 8th now).

Ever since the beginning of 8th grade I've had 2 suicide attempts. (Sad, I know)

Let's evaluate what I've been doing for a month now…binge drinking during my lunch period (my house is around the corner), showing up to classes piss drunk, cutting my wrists for no apparent reason, smacking my head with my own hand or attempting to knock the wind out of myself, hitting my head against my locker numerous times, dig sharp pencils ends into my thighs when I go to school in shorts…and yeah.

If anyone wants to know how I did my attempts, let it be known.

With the Self-Inflicting pain, it sounds as though you have alot of built up anger. Whether to yourself or some others, the rage inside of you (especially at your young age) is pretty pubescent and natural. We all hit the time when the pimples come, our things down stairs become hard in random sequences, and we have the sudden erge to cause pain. In your case, and alot of others, instead of taking it out on those around you, you find a more calm doing it to yourself. It's pretty much why you see so many minors from ages 12-16 in juvenile correction centers.

As for the suicidal thoughts, we all have them. It's us coming to the realization of our mortality. It selfishness if you ask me. An easy way out of a hard situation. But, whats easy for us, might be hard for others, if you understand what I'm saying. Instead of thinking, “I wish the pain would go away, I wish my life would end”, and becoming self-destructive, you should think, “hard times are only measured by the weakness we potray.” Anyone can make good out of a bad situation. Start living for what you have, instead of what you WANT. The people you HAVE, don't WANT the pain of losing you over selfish s**t. Think of those who care for you, not those who dont.

But, then again, some of us aren't so lucky. Some have mental issues so bad, that the only escape seems to be self destructiveness, and I can relate 100% But, at the end of the day, we are living for us and what we have, not for those around us, and what we want.

Man.. Pikk always has a good way of explaining things… haha… Anyway AL… Just find a few people you can trust in this life and talk to them… Try not to hold things inside bro, because you can blow up and emotionally when you hit that breaking point reality isn't what it seems… it feels like everything is coming down on you all at the same time… I would suggest writing about you're stuggles in your music more, or find positive outlets for all that rage and hurt you are harboring inside… And think about the good things in your life, compared to how others are living… s**t can be a lot worse… We are selfish beings… If you want to talk to me more about it, hit me up through a PM because I can relate… I've attempted a couple times and ended up in the state mental hospital… and have been in and out of hospitals for the last few years for suicidial and homicidal thoughts… I was a very sick, passive-aggressive person until I realized you have to speak your mind about things, and just live your life… everyone has problems, you just have to deal with them and move on… 

8:37 pm
August 20, 2009

Mr. AL

Master Shadowvillian

Posts: 4519

British Columbia, Canada


Xehanort said:

fimsla said:

A lot of people think it's a selfish thing to do to commit suicide… but isn't it selfish to not consider what the person was feeling?

I've had days where i really wanted to off myself but i don't think i'd ever have the guts to do it.

But i guess you can say im commiting suicide slowly… through drug abuse and stuff.

The way one person is feeling < The way an entire family + social circle(friends, teachers, etc.) feels.

Sorry…It is selfish to commit suicide, and I can even understand saying “not considering” what a certain person is feeling is “selfish” as well, but it's been proven that nothing a human being does, whether saving a person from jumping off of a building to giving a bum on the corner $10 is selfless, so yeah…

At any rate, yeah, I posted in this topic saying that you can never tell someone to “get over it” because until you have their DNA you'll never truly understand what type of emotions are emitted within their brain, but honestly, Fimsla/AL, I have no idea where you stand financially, but you're on a computer with a fully functioning internet, so you can't be in that much of rut when it comes to currency, I can tell from your pics that you obviously have access to decent clothing, you possess lyrical skills, which is something not even some of the smartest on beings Earth have, etc.

What're you killing yourself over?

You're not one of those kids in third world countries wondering when their next meal will be, you're not the defenseless 8 year old child being molested by their foul parents, you're not one of the unlucky government puppets marching around a desolate area in a combat uniform(haha @ LC) I mean, damn, you're in a lucky position. Why would you end that?

I understand, having a lousy and disgusting “woman” play you is FUBAR, but damn, suicide? Seems crazy to me, and I've got a couple screws loose.


Slap my dick on her cheek and tell her to wake up, smearing cemen on her face like it was her makeup

10:38 pm
August 20, 2009


Master Shadowvillian

Posts: 3794


no matter whats going through your head

suicide is still not an answer

Although there are debates that it is OR is not selfish

It's still cowardly…..No offense but its true

I hate to say it considering its happened to someone i once loved, but its true

Withered Wallflower (Nothing is Sacred) out now

10:39 pm
August 20, 2009


Master Shadowvillian

Posts: 3794


Idk maybe im just taking the optimistic route on this

Withered Wallflower (Nothing is Sacred) out now